"Weird Al" Yankovic — ​eBay

[Intro] Yeah [Verse 1] A used pink bathrobe A rare mint snowglobe A Smurf TV tray I bought on eBay My house is filled with This crap shows up in Bubble wrap, most every day What I bought on eBay [Chorus] Tell me why I need another pet rock Tell me why I got that Alf alarm clock Tell me why I bid on Shatner's old toupee They had it on eBay [Verse 2] I'll buy your knick-knack Just check my feedback "A++!" they all say They love me on eBay [Chorus] Gonna buy A slightly-damaged golf bag Gonna buy Some Beanie Babies, new with tag From some guy I've never met in Norway Found him on eBay [Bridge] I am the type who is liable to snipe you With two seconds left to go, whoa Got Paypal or Visa, what ever'll please ya As long as I've got the dough [Interlude] I'll buy your tchotchkes Sell me your watch, please I'll buy (I'll buy, I'll buy, I'll buy) [Bridge] I'm highest bidder! Junk keeps arriving in the mail From that worldwide garage sale (Dukes Of Hazard ashtray) Hey! A Dukes Of Hazard ashtray (Oh yeah) I bought it on eBay [Chorus] Wanna buy A Pac Man Fever lunchbox Wanna buy A case of vintage tube socks Wanna buy (A Kleenex used by Dr. Dre, Dr. Dre) Found it on eBay Want to buy That Farrah Fawcet poster Pez dispensers (and a toaster) Don't know why The kind of stuff you'd throw away I'll buy on eBay [Outro] What I bought on eBay