Alan Menken — The Rhode Island Tango

[FRED] God, I hate this room Hate that chair, hate that couch And- Ouch! So the day begins Knocking up my shins Here in Pissonit, Rhode Island! [CAROLINE] God, I hate to shop Bumble-Bee, Minute Maid Coupons, two cents off Stella Doro and Raid Every day's a bore Every step's a chore Here in Pissonit, Rhode Island! [FRED & CAROLINE] Someday, I'll place an ad [FRED] White woman wanted {CAROLINE] White woman seeking [FRED] For good times with toys [CAROLINE] Cooperative boys [FRED & CAROLINE] No perverts or prudes apply Someday, I'll place an ad [FRED] White male, well-mannered [CAROLINE] White female, desperate [FRED] Would like fun and games [CAROLINE] Send photos, no names [FRED & CAROLINE] Expect confidential reply! I could place an ad in a bad magazine Fifteen words or less No I couldn't, I mean Someone would find out Whisper, point me out [CAROLINE] So I'll walk on eggs [FRED] Bandage my legs [FRED & CAROLINE] Here in Pissonit, Rhode Island! Caroline and Fred Might as well be dead! [MUSHARI] Found my friends at last Perfect peas in a pod I'll get quit a slice When they're richer than God Norman's got the deal Norman's at the wheel Bound for Pissonit, Rhode Island!          [FRED] God I'm in despair[CAROLINE] God, I hate this town It isn't right, it isn't fun It isn't here, it isn't there It isn't me, it isn't him It isn't us, it isn't fair It isn't fair, it isn't fair It isn't fair, it isn't fair      [MURASHI] I'm almost there I'm almost there Almost there Almost there[ALL] Pissonit, Pissonit, Pissonit, Pissonit, Pissonit Beware!