Andrew Lloyd Webber — Clean the Kit

[JOHN] Soon I'm gonna be a man Be a player, not a fan 'Cos that's all I ever wanted since my life began Gonna be a soccer star Maybe drive a fancy car Build a mansion in the country for my Ma and Pa Gotta clean the kit I'm so sick of it Each day I have to go to school Have to try to keep my cool While I study for exams on how to be a fool It's no wonder I'm annoyed 'Cos the state is overjoyed Just to teach a poor boy how to join the unemployed I'm so sick of it School and cleaning kit One day, I won't have to take it 'Cause I know I'm gonna make it All I need's a chance And I'll be on my way Only fools obey the rules Thеy worked all day like stupid mules I'm busting out of hеre I'll do it one fine day I ain't eatin' shit Cleaning people's kit (Meanwhile:) [DEL] Alright Thomas? [THOMAS] Don't "alright" me, you Proddy git! My cousin had the shit kicked out of him last week by a bunch of you bowler-hatted bastards! [DEL] Nothing to do with me, mate. I'm an atheist and an internationalist: I recognize neither God nor country [THOMAS] Well, you'll "recognize" a boot in your face if you show yourself around here again, mate! Now piss off, and never come back! [DEL] But the season's just starting! This is my team! [THOMAS] This is a Catholic team! And you've just been suspended - permanently! We mean it, Copeland: come around here again, and you'll regret it! [THOMAS AND THUGS] You're not fit to wear a kit You bastard orange Proddy git We'll tear it off your back And stuff it down your throat Take our advice or pay the price We certainly won't warn you twice The tide has turned And soon we'll be the ones to gloat You're a sodding Brit Wearing Irish kit (Back to JOHN, and now MARY:) [MARY] So you're gonna be a man Not a stupid also-ran Well, I heard a lot of talk about your master plan I don't think you'll be a star You ain't gonna go that far You're all talk and sod all action You're all blah blah blah! Come to terms with it Born to clean the kit Your life's a farce Get off your arse Take my advice Get back in class Or hang around And moan and groan your life away 'Cos every hunk Ends up a drunk Just killing time His prospects sunk Still claiming that he's gonna bust out one fine day If the cap'll fit You'll be wearing it Stuck here cleaning kit [JOHN] Have no fear The time is near This boy is busting out of here I'll be burning brightly Once the flame is lit I'll make my mark Light up the dark Explosions start with just one spark And then another lad Will have to clean my kit! I'm so sick of it School and cleaning kit [MARY] You're so full of it! [JOHN] But one day I'm Not gonna take it!