Claude-Michel Schnberg — The Heat is on in Saigon Live West End Revival

[Americans] The heat is on in Saigon The girls are ready to screw On of these slits here will be Miss Saigon And since we're stuck here in hell What's a soldier to do The stick is making me choke Turns out this war is a joke Turns out the joke is on you [Engineer] Hey Monsieur Chris! Monsieur John! You've come to win Miss Saigon? [John] I gotta get my friend laid as a last souvenir [Chris] I love you pal but your bullshit I've had up to here[Engineer, spoken] It's about time you got laid![John, spoken] Whatever, man.[Engineer, John, Chris] The heat is on in Saigon [John] But 'till they tell us we're gone I'm gonna buy you a girl [Chris] You can buy me a beer [Engineer] It's showtime! (spoken) From Haiphong to the Mekong Delta, may I present the most beautiful girls in Saigon, Mimi...[Mimi] See my bikini, it's just the right size  [Engineer, spoken] Yvette...[Yvette] Don't you enjoy how it rides up my thighs?  [Engineer, spoken] Dominique...[Dominique] Look from behind, it'll knock out your eyes  [Engineer, spoken] Yvonne...[Yvonne] I'll show you my special trophy of war  [Engineer, spoken] Oh she will Fifi...[Fifi] For a Marine, I'll show more[Americans] You won't get up off the floor The heat is on in Saigon Don't tell me I'm reassigned All that chickenshit sucks Tonight I'm out of my mind Not to mention ten bucks [Engineer, spoken] You all know her as The Sex Toy from Hanoi Miss Gigi van Tranh! [Gigi] If I'm your pin-up, I'll melt all your brass Stuck on your ball with a pin in my ass If you get me you will travel first class I'll show you, we will make magic, cheri [Engineer] You buy more tickets from me The winner gets her for free [Chris] The meat is cheap in Saigon I used to love getting stoned, waking up with some whore I don't know why I went dead, it's not fun anymore [Engineer, spoken] How about something fresh from the country, untouched Legs un-parted, parts uncharted, Kim... [Kim] I'm seventeen and I'm new here today The village I come from seems so far away All of these girls here know much more what to say But I know I'm so much more than you see A million dreams are in me [Chris] Good Jesus, John, who is she? [Americans and Girls] The Cong is tightening the noose Is it a week or a day or an hour we got? Tonight could be our last shot, got to put it to use. I got a fever babe and you're gonna catch it I got an itch and baby you'd better scratch it [Americans] Mimi, Gigi, Yvette or Yvonne Gonna buy me a beer Here's to you Miss Saigon [Engineer, spoken] Yvonne, Yvette, Fifi, Mimi, Kim, Gigi! Attention, s'il vous plait! By popular demand Miss GIgi van Tranh Is tonights' Miss Saigon [Americans] The heat is on in Saigon How we get used to the smell So let's wasted, get high and get laid A good-bye party in hell! [Engineer, spoken] And now who wins my little pussycat? Number 66!