Dolly Parton — A Lil Ole Bitty Pissant Country Place

[Verse 1] It's just a little bitty pissant country place Ain't nothing much to see No drinking allowed, we get a nice quiet crowd, plain as it can be It's just a piddly squatting old time country place Ain't nothing to hide at all Just lots of good will and maybe one small thrill But there's nothing dirty going on Nothing dirty going on We get simple farmers, local business men Congress folks from Austin, young boys looking for sin Now we used to get a lot of rough necks, when the oil boom was high But pay day would get a little rowdy, thank God the field ran dry [Chorus 1] It's just a little bitty pissant country place, nothing much to see No drinking allowed, we get a nice quiet crowd, plain as it can be It's just a piddly squatting old time country place, nothing to hide at all Just lots of good will, and maybe one small thrill, but there's nothing dirty going on [Verse 2] I don't hire no married girl, they're not on the ball They got homes and husbands, they're not stable at all You know they don't understand a thing about a proper business day Now what's the point in opening up the store if you give the goods away [Chorus 1] [Verse 3] Keep your language clean girls, keep your bedrooms neat And don't hang around the town cafe and say "hi" on the street Mind your P's and Q's and manners, and you don't need no other tools Because every girl that lives here knows my special no-no rules Yeah every girl that lives here knows Miss Mona's no-no rules Ruby Rae, start 'em! Beds are not to be wallowed in That's the kind of thing that big fat lazy hogs do And it don't make money! Beatrice! I won't tolerate no tying up my telephone with other people's business Eloise honey! And please don't show us no tattoos No hearts and flowers on your thigh It's downright tacky Brands belong on cattle, and that ain't what we're selling at Miss Mona's [Chorus 2] Do you catch my drift? I pay the food and the rent and the utilities You keep your mind on your work responsibilities Don't let your mouth overload your capabilities And we can get along Dawn! Any bad habits you come in with, get rid of right now Tatty Joe! I can't stand no chewing gum it looks just like a cow Lindy Lue! Any one taking sick leave oughta be real sure they're sick And every time you hear that bell You better get here double quick [Verse 4] And as for pimps Pimps are something you don't need To get your daily business done Are you listening good? Keep them leeches and blood suckers off the back roads I know how to use a gun And nobody messes with my girls And any questions you might have about the way I run this place Don't gripe and whine behind my back Just tell me face to face, I'm open-minded, say it all Then go upstairs and pack, the door's that-a-way [Chorus 2] She pays the food and the rent and the utilities We keep our mind on our work responsibilities Don't let your mouth overload your capabilities And we can get along [Chorus 1] [x2] It's just a little bitty pissant country place, nothing much to see No drinking allowed, we get a nice quiet crowd, plain as it can be It's just a piddly squatting old time country place, nothing to hide at all Just lots of good will and maybe one small thrill Just lots of good will and maybe one small thrill Just lots of good will and maybe one small thrill But there's nothing dirty going on Nothing dirty going on