Eminem — No One’s Iller

[Intro: Bizarre] Yeah… ha ha ha (Bang!) Yeah, Bizarre Kid comin' at you Eminem and Fuzz and Mr. Swifty, ha ha No one's iller than me (What?) No one, no one is iller than me No one is iller than me It's Mr. Swifty from the 313 [Verse 1: Swifty McVay] I make rappers wanna turn into singers I keep hoes lickin' they fingers Bring this competition and face this meaning Got your whole crew doin' subpoenas Hell nah, you ain't seen a crew, genius Murder whoever's between us, pack your heaters Keep it close, you can't beat us While your whole crew treat us like G's, you best believe this I done made quadriplegics outta these non-rappin' rejects While the whole world ejects your tape It ain't no secret that your shit sounds fake You can't stop it, my mind state Makes it too late for cops in tryin' to stop the crime rate I'm like toothaches: I'm painful to rappers Then you can tell from these shells How I gotta bend 'em like root canals I erase all trails, somethin' farther from gettin' bail Makes you wanna kill an emcee yourself, you might as well Be within a 25 to life sentence, on linking trials Horrified, and keep on frontin', repentin' and lose they bowels Everything is foul when Swift's around, vacate now Niggas dumb enough to try to front and escape, how? I'm gonna take this 'gnac and drink it straight wild Niggas steady fallin' in my face like milk crates – BLAAAOW! It's Swifty from the 313 Like I said, no one is iller than me, unnhh [Verse 2: Bizarre] Me and Eminem and Mike, drivin' down Van Dyke Get my dick sucked late at night by a fuckin' transvestite Still on probation for stranglin' my boy Jason Should be takin' my medication, it's nine to 10 I'm facin' Last week this old man I had to blast ‘Cause he tried to help me out when my car was out of gas Ripped this old lady, hung her neck by a hook Didn't realize it was my grandmother 'til I checked her pocketbook Fuckin' with the white boys got me back on crack Better explain where the hell your TV's and VCR's is at I done lost 100 pounds, I ain't been eatin' like I should This wounded dog in the street is sure lookin' good Rob this little boy in his fuckin' paper route Throwin' bombs at day care centers and yell: "Everybody get out!" My girl beat my ass and shot me in the back with a two-piece ‘Cause she found out I was havin' an affair With her 10-year-old niece [Hook: Bizarre] No one, no one's iller than me It's Bizarre Kid straight from the 313 No one, no one is iller than me It's Bizarre Kid straight from the 313 [Verse 3: Eminem] Nobody better test me, ‘cause I don't wanna get messy Especially when I step inside this bitch, dipped freshly New Lugz, give the crew hugs, guzzle two mugs Before I do drugs that make me throw up like flu bugs True thugs, rugged unshaven messy scrubs Whippin' 40-bottles like the fuckin' Pepsi clubs Down a fifth, crack open a six I'm on my seventh 8-Ball, now I gotta take a piss I'm hollerin' at these hoes that got boyfriends Who gives a fuck who they was? I'm always takin' someone else's girl like Cool J does They probably don't be packin' anyways — do they, Fuzz? We walked up, stomped they asses and blew they buzz Mics get sandblasted, stab your abdomen With a hand-crafted pocketknife and spill your antacid Sprayed your motherfuckin' crib up when I ran past it Fuckin' felon, headed to Hell in a handbasket Talkin' shit'll get you, your girl and your man blasted Kidnapped and slapped in a van, wrapped in Saran plastic Get your damn ass kicked By these fantastic furious four motherfuckers Flashin' in front of your face without the Grandmasters Slim Shady, ain't nobody iller than me [Verse 4: Fuzz Scoota] I run shit like an ass with legs Massive lead to leave your cabbage red Similar to your ass in a casket dead Drastic spread of acid heads Come to abort you like a bastard egg That trash you said got you standin' on plastic legs Ask the feds if I'm past the edge Rockin' the most classic threads, flashin' bread Roll down the window: "Bitch, you got some fantastic legs!" You can get 'til that ass get red You can get 'til that ass get red Bizarre, you get him and him Swift, you get him and him, I'll get him and him Leave the other two for my nigga Eminem Never writer's block, I block writers My block's tighter, ante up and get your top fighters Got fired for jumpin' the counter with a mop stick Some bitch ran up screamin', "Get the cops, quick!" And got drop kicked, now she screamin', "Stop it!" Got clips to stop shit, rock shit and grab this hot shit Wherever you shop, bitch, Fuzz Scoota '97 crop pick Sick of y'all niggas lookin' at me like I got tits I shoot a rocket through your optic You niggas still don't know the top pick I got bricks, lose my foot in your ass And have you shittin' socks, bitch P Rock shit, leave your fuckin' knot split Grab the green from Al by showin' him hot grits (No one) — Ain't nobody iller than me [Hook: Bizzare] It's the Mr. Fuzzy from the 313 No one, no one is iller than me It's Eminem and Swift from the 313 No one, no one is iller than me It's Fuzz and Buzz-arre from the 313 [Outro: Bizzare] You have now witnessed four ill emcees From the home of potholes and trash We'll lyrically blast