Frank Zappa — Dinah-Moe-Humm FZ: OZ

I couldn't say where she's coming' from But I just met a lady named Dinah-Moe Humm She stroll on over, say look here, bum I got a forty-dollar bill says you can't make me cum (Y'jes can't do it) She made a bet with her sister who's a little bit dumb She could prove it any time all men was scum I don't mind that she called me a bum But I knew right away she was really gonna cum (So I got down to it) I whipped off her bloomers 'n stiffened my thumb An' applied rotation to her sugar plum I poked 'n stroked till my wrist got numb But I still didn't hear no Dinah-Moe Humm Dinah-Moe Humm Dinah-Moe Humm Dinah-Moe Humm Where's this Dinah-Moe Comin' from I done spent three hours An' I ain't got a crumb From the Dinah-Moe, Dinah-Moe, Dinah-Moe From the Dinah-Moe Humm Got a spot that gets me hot An' you ain't been to it I got a spot that gets me hot But you ain't been to it Got a spot that gets me hot But you ain't been to it Got a spot that gets me hot But you ain't been to it 'Cause I can't get out of it Unless I get into it An' I never get into it Unless I get out of it An' I don't wanna get into it Unless I get out of it An' I can't get out of it Till I get into it (She looked over at me with a glazed eye And some bovine perspiration on her upper lip area And she said these words and I quote . . . ) Just get me wasted An' you're half-way there 'Cause if my mind's tore up Then my body don't care I rubbed my chinny-chin-chin An' said my-my-my What sort of thing Might this lady get high upon? The forty-dollar bill did not matter no more When her sister got nekkid an' laid on the floor She said Dinah-Moe might win the bet But she could use a little ______ if I wasn't done yet I told her . . Just because the sun Want a place in the sky No reason to assume I wouldn't give her a try So I pulled on her hair Got her legs in the air An' asked if she had any cooties in there (Whaddya mean cooties! No cooties on me!) She was buns-up kneelin' (BUNS UP!) I was wheelin' an dealin' (WHEELIN' AN' DEALIN' AN' OOOOH!) She surrender to the feelin' (SHE SWEETLY SURRENDERED) An' she started in to squealin' Dinah-Moe watched from the edge of the bed With her lips just a-twitchin', her face gone red Some drool rollin' down From the edge of her chin While she spied the condition Her sister was in She quivered 'n quaked An' clutched at herself While her sister made a joke About her mental health Till Dinah-Moe finally Did give in I told her All she really needed Was some discipline . . I said Kiss my aura . . . Dora . . M-M-M . . . it's real angora Real angora, it's real angora It's real angora Would y'all like some more-a? Right here on the flora? An' how 'bout you, Fauna? Do you wanna? Wait, you sound like you're chokin' on somethin' (That's alright) Hey, listen . . (That's alright) D'you think that I could interest you In a pair of zircon-encrusted tweezers? Tweezers, yes Lemme sterilize 'em . . Lend me your lighter . . I couldn't say where she's coming' from But I just met a lady named Dinah-Moe Humm She stroll on over, say look here, bum I got a forty-dollar bill says you can't make me cum (Y'jes can't do it) She made a bet with her sister who's a little bit dumb She could prove it any time all men was scum I don't mind that she called me a bum But I knew right away she was really gonna EWWW . . (So I got down to it) I whipped off her bloomers 'n stiffened my thumb An' applied rotation to her sugar plum I poked 'n stroked till my wrist got numb An' you know I heard some Dinah-Moe Humm Some Dinah-Moe Humm Dinah-Moe Dinah-Moe Dinah-Moe Little Dinah-Moe Dinah-Moe Dinah-Moe again Little Dinah-Moe Some Dinah-Moe (again) Some Dinah-Moe Little Dinah-Moe again Little Dinah-Moe Little Dinah-Moe again Dinah-Moe (Dinah-Moe Humm) Dinah-Moe again Dinah-Moe Little Dinah-Moe . . FZ: Look out! Good night! . . . Thank you!