Frank Zappa — Jim/Roy Mystery Disc

JCB: What's goin' on here? I thought we were gonna play a Rock & Roll concert Ian: Rock & Roll? I, I already quit the Mothers JCB: How are you gonna get laid if you don't play rock & roll and drink beer? You get laid after the concert if you play rock & roll, this kind of crap you're not gonna, you're not gonna get laid anyway with that uniform on. I'll tell you what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna quit I'm gonna go out and hustle me some chick, the hell with you Ian: Jimmy, you need some discipline JCB: I'm leaving the group Ensemble: Boo! Boo! FZ: Jimmy Carl, I must inform you, I must inform you, Jimmy Carl, for your own good, that here in London you're not gonna get any pussy unless you look like a popstar. Fix him up! . . . Mod Jacket . . (JCB: Oh Jeezus . . . ) FZ: Frilly Mod Neckpiece, Jimi Hendrix wig, and a Feather Boa JCB: WAAAAAAAAAAHHH! FZ: Jimmy Carl Black enters the audience to hustle some young ladies. And if you're really lucky, get something for the robots . . . Mmmm, their little mechanical things are going up and down, up and down . . Roy: Domino, Domino, Domino Biz-bo-OH Domino Biz-bo-OH, Amen, Domino Biz-bo, Hallelujah, eh . . FZ: Et cum spiritu tuo . . Roy: Ian, I don't think I qualify for the Mothers (FZ: They're making up their lines as they go along, isn't it thrilling?) Roy: I think I'm holding the group back because I'm a MEXICAN. And also because I don't play bass good Ian: I don't care how you can play bass but we have NO MEXICANS in this group Roy: And I wanna join your group Ian: No Mexicans! Roy: I can sing opera, I have already quit, I cut my hair, I got all my shit together here. I can do it Ian: I don't care how you look you gotta be able to cut the part Roy: I can sing. Please. Please, Ian, give me a CHANCE Ian: I don't believe you can sing Roy: Ah, PLEASE! Ah, Ian, PLEASE, IAN! Please! Ian: Okay Mexican Roy: Please? Ian: Okay Mexican Roy: Okay Ian: Sing this note: Roy (with JCB): You think everything gonna be alright Ian: Okay. You passed the first part of your audition. Now you gotta sing . . Roy: Mi, mi, mi, mi . . Poo-lah Poo-la-ah poo-lah Poo-da poo-lah poo-lah poo-oo-lah Wee-ooo-wee-ooo-eee-eee-ooo-ooo Ah-ah-ah ah-aaah-ah-aaah Aa-aa-ah aa-ah Wee-ooo-wee-ooo Aa-aa-aa-aa-aa-aa-aa-aa-aa-aa-aah Ensemble: BOO! BOO! FZ: The rejected Mexican pope leaves the stage