Gracie Fields — What Can You Give A Nudist For His Birthday

Oh dear, I am worried I know I'm laughin' really, but I am worried It's my brother's birthday and I don't know what to buy him, oh dear Can I ask you a question, a question that's silly? It's something I can't figure out, I hope you won't say no It's all about my brother, my brother, John Willy He's joined a nudist colony, so what I want to know What can you buy a nudist on his birthday, birthday? What sought of birthday present can you buy? I can't think what to give him, no matter how I try Do you think he would be allowed to wear his old school tie? What can you give a nudist for a present? The things I used to buy him would be wrong I'd send a cheque but dash it, how could he go out and cash it What can you give a nudist when his birthday comes along? What can you give a nudist for his birthday? What sought of birthday present can you buy? I bought a pair of braces, just like a silly pup But what's the good of braces if there's nought wants holdin' up? What can you give a nudist for a present? I'm sure a bowler hat would be all wrong And he's not the kind of fella who would need an umbrella Oh what can you give a nudist when his birthday comes along, oh dear-dear? I've been in holy terror the time they [?] I did think of a camera but snapshots are taboo A bicycle sounds stupid when you're dressed up like Cupid I must send something soon, and oh, that's why I'm askin' you What can you give a nudist on his birthday? What sought of birthday present can you buy? And here's another riddle, but give it up I won't When at a dance, do they wear fancy dress or do they don't? What can you give a nudist for a present? I somehow think that cuff links would be wrong And a watch chain would look silly draped across the front of Willy What can you give a? What can you give a nudist on his birthday? What sought of birthday present can you buy? I have heard that they play hockey, so something I have got But I don't know for certain if they wear shin guards or not What can you give a nudist for a present? A shop girl told me spats would be all wrong She said good gracious madam, just imagine spats on Adam What can you give a nudist when his birthday comes along Oh dear-dear, what can I buy, no let's be, really there is, no honest, what can I buy A lump of soap A lump of soap, oh that's a good idea, a lump of soap And he's always smoky too, that's good, thank you very much