Jim Croce — The Ball of Kerrymuir

Four-and-twenty virgins come down from Inverness And when the Ball was over, there were four-and-twenty less Singin' balls to your partner, your ass against the wall If ya never been had on a Saturday night, ya never been had at all.. There was doin' in the parlor, there was doin' on the stones But ya couldn't a hear the music for the wheezin' and the groans Singin' balls to your partner, your ass against the wall If ya never been had on a Saturday night, ya never been had at all The undertaker, he was there, all wrapped up in a shroud Swingin' from the chandelier, and peein' on the crowd Singin' balls to your partner, your ass against the wall If ya never been had on a Saturday night, ya never been had at all The village cripple, he was there, ah he could not do much So he lined the ladies against the wall, and he did 'em with his crutch Singin' balls to your partner, your ass against the wall If ya never been had on a Saturday night, ya never been had at all Miss Mary McPherson was standin' way up front Some posies in her hand, and a carrot in her cunt Singin' balls to your partner, your ass against the wall If ya never been had on a Saturday night, ya never been had at all The Village postman, he was there, but the poor man had the pox He could not do the lassies, so he did the letter box Singin' balls to your partner, your ass against the wall If ya never been had on a Saturday night, ya never been had at all The Village Magician, he was there, he gave us all a laugh He pulled his foreskin over his head, and he vanished up his ass Singin' balls to your partner, your ass against the wall If ya never been had on a Saturday night, ya never been had at all