John Cooper Clarke — I Dont Want to Be Nice

Here he comes now.... The fast fingers, the expert eyes And the same old 'how'd you do' Disgust is just his dumb disguise He wants a word with you His problems are the end A mouth needs exercise The last thing I need is another friend I don't want to be nice I don't want to be nice I think it's clever to swear Better seek some sound advice I would look elsewhere Your face is an obvious case I wouldn't put it about This is neither the time nor place To sort your problems out What you see is what you get You only live twice A friend in need is a friend in debt I don't want to be nice No we never met before I'm very happy to say Far from perfect strangers I'd like to keep it that way I'm not your psychoanalyst I'd rather talk to mice You're so easy to resist I don't want to be nice I don't want to be nice I think it's clever to swear I would seek some sound advice I would look elsewhere Your face is an obvious case I wouldn't put it about This is neither the time nor place To sort your problems out What you see is what you get You only live twice A friend in need is a friend in debt I don't want to be nice