LL Cool J — Murdergram

[Intro] Ayo, don't go near the speakers [Verse] The big showdown, the display of skill I'm that type of guy, so put your girl on the pill Take a family snapshot and kiss your wife 'Cause I'm like a knife, I cause grief and strife And I'll take your life and choke you like a python I'ma do you wrong Any emcee, who you wanna name? I'm one panther that can't be tamed You talk about guns, punk, it don't alarm me Got enough cash to make a whole damn army I can't hold back the way that I feel 'Cause when I bust a rhyme it's like you're slipping on banana peels You're like fruitcake and fruit cocktails First your title now I'm takin' your female All of a sudden, you're so proud and Black A baseball hat, but you ain't saying jack The ripper is back and you can't escape 'Cause one of my records'll sell more than your whole tape I want beef, bring on the rookies I got more than just Cool J cookies Rip, rock, crush, stomp the comp I'm poison, come and take a chomp I bet you your teeth'll end up around the corner, kid Don't ask me why I did uncivilized damage to a nobody And I'm carrying a gun if I'm rhymin' at the party New York, Chicago, Detroit, LA I'll slay wherever you play D.C. or Philly or Baltimore I murder the rich and maim the poor Perpetratin' in your video, here's the real schoolin' Country accents, who you think you're foolin'? I play Russian Roulette, not Craps You're only known 'cause of Yo! MTV Raps And Rap City and BET And Channel 31, but now here I come To save the day and now you're getting done Like a hooker, don't drop the soap, crumb The first sign of the battle, you little fink Is you see blood coming out your kitchen sink Your mic's a baby bottle, son Some say they ain't, but I am the one To slice and dice and fry and boil, to bake and serve a nerd I heard a word occurred to him that he could move and wouldn't get moved on Like a shotgun blast Big mouth emcees, I'll bet you none last 'Cause they ain't stable or able And I boost the party like jumper cables So plug me in and put me on Arsenio Hall so I can battle 'em all From coast to coast, blind, crippled or crazy You use a dictionary but you still don't phase me Listen and weep, you sound cheap You preach about Blackness, but you represent wackness You're knocking on the castle door But when you fall in the moat, I won't see you no more Let's get together and diss LL Use his name and your records might sell I can't believe your band of dead maggots Crawling all over my name, I won't have it You better look in the mirror and rethink your plan Why walk in quicksand When you can stand on your own two feet? I'm rippin' emcees from "Funky Drummer" to "Big Beat" Name the date and the arena You three year old ballerina I can't believe that suckers try to throw down Whether you're new or older than Motown Just kick back, I don't slack, attack a wack and slap a rap They can't handle the format Whether you're suave or smooth Rough or rugged, all I need is a groove I display a way to slay, punk, play to pay Mr. Morris has entered the buffet Some of y'all are sitting in bowls Plates of the hot buttered rolls Beat you with baloney, stab you with salami 'Cause when I get hot, I get hot like pastrami Then I make you wonder Why you don't hear bass, but you feel the thunder You get kuff, I'll knock out your tooth We'll be fighting from the lobby to the roof You annoy me like a roach at dinner time Yo, Marley (What's up?) It's Miller time Nah, man, just kick a little more Pass the brass knuckles let me break his jaw When I'm on the microphone I want silence Let KRS-One stop the violence Ain't no rivals, ain't no competition Punk, I'm beatin' you into submission I'm gettin' busier than ever before Never more will I slack, I'ma keep it real raw Eat you up like a pack-jam Video's more popular than Batman Rippin' you to shreds, tap you in the head Then leave the battle lookin' happy as a newlywed Give me a TEC-9 to spray Save the beef and put it on layaway I'm in command, your man abandoned, slammin' jammin' fans will understand Then you weep about the murdergram