[Verse 1]
Tiptoed up the stairs, climbed into the attic
Opened up my grandma's trunk
Well, isn't this dramatic?
What could be inside? I could almost squeal
With delight as I pulled out an ancient dusty reel
(Oh, uh-huh)
[Interlude]
[Pre-Chorus 1]
There was a label on the side, reading, "E.A.P."
I wondered to myself, what could this be?
I dashed to my projector with excitement in my eyes
But as the footage rolled it rather took me by surprise
[Chorus 1]
'Cause Elvis Porn is what I viewed
There he was, completely in the nude
Strumming his guitar, quivering his lips
Singing in the microphone, shaking his hips
Oh, Elvis Porn, holy guacamole
The big fat buck-naked king of rock and roll, he
Was devoid of any clothes
With his naughty bits exposed
Oh, what a sight, that Elvis Porn
[Verse 2]
"What the hell," I thought
This is rather odd
I thought of where I found it
And I shouted, "Oh, my God!"
Where did Grandma get this
Footage of the King?
Why the hell did sweet old Granny
Have this awful thing?
(Oh, uh-huh)
[Interlude]
(Elvis! Elvis! Elvis! Elvis! Elvis! Elvis! Elvis! Elvis!)
[Pre-Chorus 2]
So I confronted her with the footage I found
She didn't seem to recognise it so I wound
The film in the projector, and gave it a spin
She keeled over dead with a big fat grin
[Chorus 2]
'Cause Elvis Porn is what she viewed
There he was, completely in the nude
Strumming his guitar, quivering his lips
Singing in the microphone, shaking his hips
Oh, Elvis Porn, holy guacamole
The big fat buck-naked king of rock and roll, he
Was devoid of any clothes
With his naughty bits exposed
No blue suede shoes
Covering up his little toes
No white jumpsuit
And nobody knows
The tale behind this Elvis Porn!
[Outro]
(Elvis! Elvis! Elvis! Elvis! Elvis! Elvis! Elvis! Elvis! Elvis!)
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