Spike Jones and His City Slickers — Camptown Races

*Instrumental of "Camptown Races"* [Uncle Spike Jones] Luther? [Cousin Luther Roundtree] [unknown] [Uncle Spike Jones] What are you looking so sad for? [Cousin Luther Roundtree] Well, Uncle Spike, you're so mean to me, how do you expect me to look? [Uncle Spike Jones] How can you say I’m mean to you? You know there ain't a word of truth in that! Why, I wouldn't hurt a fly! Why, even the dogs lick my hands when I walk down the street! [Cousin Luther Roundtree] Well, if you’d wash your hands after you eat, that wouldn't happen! *Instrumental of "Camptown Races"* [Cousin Luther Roundtree] Uncle Spike, did I tell you about going reindeer hunting? [Uncle Spike Jones] No, how'd you make out? [Cousin Luther Roundtree] Well, the first day, I seen one deer and shot two dogs [Uncle Spike Jones] That's a good start! What happened the next day? [Cousin Luther Roundtree] I seen two deer and shot four dogs [Uncle Spike Jones] Terrific! What happened the last day? [Cousin Luther Roundtree] I took out a deer and hunted for dogs *Instrumental of "Camptown Races"* [Cousin Luther Roundtree] Uncle Spike, did I tell you about the bad accident I had today? [Uncle Spike Jones] No, what happened? [Cousin Luther Roundtree] Well sir, I was in a great big hassle to get down here at the studio, and a feller stepped out in front of me, and I run over him before I could stop [Uncle Spike Jones] Well, what'd you do then? [Cousin Luther Roundtree] I turned around and hollered, "Hey, you, look out!" [Uncle Spike Jones] Well, what'd the feller do? [Cousin Luther Roundtree] He raised up and said, "What's the matter, are you coming back?!" *Instrumental of "Camptown Races"* [Cousin Luther Roundtree] Uncle Spike, did you hear about my aunt been awful sick? [Uncle Spike Jones] No, Luther, she's not really sick: it’s all in her mind! She just thinks she’s sick! [Cousin Luther Roundtree] Well, she had a nervous breakdown! [Uncle Spike Jones] No, Luther: it's all in her mind! She just thinks she had a nervous breakdown! [Cousin Luther Roundtree] Yeah? Well, anyhow, she thinks she’s dead now *Instrumental of "Camptown Races"*