The Dubliners — The Sick Note Why Paddys Not At Work Today

[Verse 1] Dear sir, I write this note to you, to tell you of me plight And at the time of writing, I am not a pretty sight My body is all black and blue, me face a deathly gray And I write this note to say why Paddy's not at work, today [Verse 2] While working on the fourteenth floor, some bricks I had to clear Now, to throw them down from such a height, it was not a good idear The foreman wasn't very pleased, he being an awkward sod He said I'd have to take them down the ladders in me hod [Verse 3] Now clearing all these bricks by hand, it was so very slow So I hoisted up a barrel, and secured the rope below But in my haste to do the job, I was too blind to see That a barrel full of building bricks was heavier than me [Verse 4] And so when I untied the rope, the barrel fell like lead And clinging tightly to the rope I started up instead Well, I shot up like a rocket, 'til to my dismay I found That half way up I met the bloody barrel coming down [Verse 5] Well the barrel broke me shoulder, as to the ground it sped And when I reached the top, I banged the pulley with me head Well, I clung on tight, though numbed with shock, from this almighty blow And the barrel spilled out half the bricks, fourteen floors below [Verse 6] Now, when these bricks had fallen from the barrel to the floor I then outweighed the barrel and so started down once more Still clinging tightly to the rope, I sped towards the ground And I landed on the broken bricks the barrel scattered round [Verse 7] I lay there groaning on the ground I thought I'd passed the worst When the barrel hit the pulley wheel, and then the bottom burst Well, a shower of bricks rained down on me, I hadn't got a hope As I lay there bleeding on the ground, I let go the bloody rope [Verse 8] The barrel then being heavier, it started down once more And landed right across me as I lay upon the floor Well, it broke three ribs, and my left arm, and I can only say That I hope you understand, why Paddy's not at work today