Benny Bell — Holiday Shaving Cream

The chimney was long, dark and scary And my Santa suit just barely fit While I thought I'd land safely on ashes But I landed in three feet of sh- -aving cream Be nice and clean Shave every day and you'll always look keen I play with my Hanukkah dreidel But I act like a kid, I admit Then my puppy gets into the action And buries my dreidel in sh- -aving cream Be nice and clean Shave every day and you'll always look keen Last night I built nine Christmas reindeer From a do-it-yourself model kit But boy was I shocked in the morning When behind them were nine piles of sh- -aving cream Be nice and clean Shave every day and you'll always look keen The latkes last year were amazing My mom always fries up a hit But today I guess she was distracted 'cause I think that she fried them in sh- -aving cream Be nice and clean Shave every day and you'll always look clean A new Christmas tree looks amazing Every branch is all tinseled and lit But below where I hid all the presents My kid left a big bag of sh- -aving cream Be nice and clean Shave every day and you'll always look clean I love all the stories of Judah; How his army would just never quit; How for eight days they hid in a temple With nothing but oil and sh- -aving cream Be nice and clean Shave every day and you'll always look clean Now my holiday song has concluded It's my hope you enjoyed it a bit But if you are appalled or offended Stick your head... In a bucket... Of sh- -aving cream Be nice and clean Shave every day and you'll always look clean